Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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