What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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