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• (205): View more from Alabama

  I only kidnapped one of them. chill

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.

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  25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (970): View more from Colorado

  i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?

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• (731): View more from Tennessee

  I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.

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• (561): View more from Florida

  Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.

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• (623): View more from Arizona

  I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?

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• 

  These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (660): View more from Missouri

  My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting

  (410): View more from Maryland

  You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.

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