You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
