I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
