I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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