so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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