That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
