the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
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