I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
