great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
i think im in europe. pls send help
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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