Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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