so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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