Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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