I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
