So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Randomize