God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
