If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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