Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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