one might say we're banned from that church
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
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hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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