Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65

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  (248): Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room (248): Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65 http://tfl.nu/zat2
  Replies (2) Good night (1094) Bad night (769)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.

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  (503): the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me. http://tfl.nu/obxv
  Replies (38) Good night (5413) Bad night (901)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete

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  (309): Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete http://tfl.nu/n4gc
  Replies (36) Good night (6205) Bad night (1162)
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  (858): View more from California

  So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?

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  (858): So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism? http://tfl.nu/tlrk
  Replies (13) Good night (5565) Bad night (958)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?

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  (309): Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away? http://tfl.nu/ex4f
  Replies (19) Good night (5063) Bad night (877)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis

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  (215): This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis http://tfl.nu/mvim
  Replies (17) Good night (1620) Bad night (2763)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover

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  (410): why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover http://tfl.nu/9q3l
  Replies (2) Good night (745) Bad night (1158)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.

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  (513): I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate. http://tfl.nu/sg11
  Replies (4) Good night (764) Bad night (1749)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.

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  (440): We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault. http://tfl.nu/4i3v
  Replies (5) Good night (814) Bad night (531)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested

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  (201): she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested http://tfl.nu/bnqm
  Replies (6) Good night (1726) Bad night (538)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.

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  (901): Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain. http://tfl.nu/cpjv
  Replies (2) Good night (1331) Bad night (547)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  So the keyword here is "hammered"?

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  (404): And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right? (1-404): So the keyword here is "hammered"? http://tfl.nu/1kxs
  Replies (1) Good night (1436) Bad night (401)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..

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  (603): Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please.. http://tfl.nu/45sb
  Replies (4) Good night (538) Bad night (992)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends

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  (609): Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends http://tfl.nu/v4m8
  Replies (11) Good night (536) Bad night (1433)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.

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  (318): He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free. http://tfl.nu/dxth
  Replies (0) Good night (853) Bad night (295)

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