why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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