Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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