What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
