I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
