When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
