how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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