Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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