Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize