the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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