so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
