I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
