And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
