Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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