im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
