Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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