it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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