Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
