worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
