I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
