no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I use my feet as sexual weapons
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
