I heard we made out
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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