You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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