there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
