Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Randomize