College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
