STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus