Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize
