uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
