is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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