Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Randomize
